I've Come To Fix Your Boiler
by everclearbabe
Summary: When Jasper turns up to fix Alice's plumbing problem, the boiler is the last thing on their minds...One-shot AxJ A/U A/H OOC rated M for Lemon. Done as part of a mini competition with a friend of mine, the winner is up to YOU!


******My friend Bee87 and I, decided that we wanted to challenge ourselves with a mini competition. And so the One-shot lemon challenge was created. We asked a few friends for words we HAD to have included in the story to make it even more taxing. The winner will be decided by YOU the reader! So please review us and let us know which story you like best. The link for Bee's story is at the bottom at the page.**

The rules for our little competition are as follows:

******1. It must be between the same characters, in this case we both decided on Alice and Jasper.**

******2. It must be at least 1000 words. It can be more, but no less.**

******3. The ten words we had to encompass into our short stories are:  
********- Flower  
- Tea-towel  
- Fairground  
- Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis  
- Callottes  
- Blue  
- Water  
- Worktop  
- Elbow  
- Glockenspiel**

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**I've Come To Fix Your Boiler**

**JPOV**

Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis:_ a lung disease caused by the inhalation of very fine silica dust, causing inflammation in the lungs. _Perfect. I had just finished a job in Port Angeles at some old man's house. I could claim all the pipes were disintegrating and I must have inhaled some dust or something.

I had planned to book the day off as holiday, but had forgotten until it was too late. pulling a sicky was my only hope of making it to the fairground on time to see my best mate Edward sitting in the hot seat for "Dunk-a-Fool". he had signed up when we were under the influence and couldn't get out of it.

I put the book away under the dashboard and climbed out my van. I walked through the doors to the office feigning a cough, trying to make it sound as dry as possible. Rosalie, the hot secretary and bitch-extraordinaire, didn't even look up from her nail filing.

"hello, Jasper" she sighed, bored. "you wont get out of it that easily. you're little friend Edward has already been in here looking for you and gave it all away."

bugger. I gave up on the cough immediately. there was no shitting Rosalie. I made my way over to the front desk just up to sit on it, while she went through some files to find out my next appointment. there was no point sucking up, Rosalie and me just didn't quite see eye to eye and I knew it would only work against me, so instead I used my time wisely and fiddled with a pen top.

"she always puts things in the silliest places.." she mumbled to herself. I looked over just in time to see her bending down at a filing cabinet. Damn, that bitch was fine even in the weirdest of outfits. today she was sporting a pair of short black calottes with a tight black blouse. when she stood back up and turned around, I managed to sneak an eyeful of her cleavage, until she cut me a vicious evil.

"here" she snapped, holding out the details of my next job. I looked them over and saw the address was only down the road. It was just a leaky pipe on the boiler too. Easy peasy. I would probably make it to see Edward getting dunked after all. I grinned at the thought as I left the office and climbed back into the van.

As I drove I turned on the radio. After hearing what sounded like a broken glockenspiel hammering out over the airwaves, I quickly turned it off again.

I pulled up outside the house and checked it out a bit. The place seemed nice enough. Pretty coloured bushes beside the path lead the way to the front door. I got out my toolbox and walked up to the door, before ringing the bell.

"hi, I'm here to fix your boiler." I said, almost stumbling over the words.

Rosalie was hot, but this woman was gorgeous. She was petite with bright, clear, sea-blue eyes and pale skin. Her short, dark hair shined in contrast to a white flower she had in it. She was wearing a white dress, which was wet in patches. She was also holding a drenched tea-towel.

"come on in" she said, looking up at me with what looked like hunger in her eyes.

**APOV**

the doorbell rang and I cursed. I had just managed to dry up most of the floor, but now the tea-towel was drenched, I was wet, and the puddle was growing again. I gave up and went to answer the door.

And there stood the most handsome man I had ever seen. Tall, with messy, blond hair and piercing hazel eyes. I forgot what I was doing and just stared at him shamelessly.

"hi, I'm here to fix your boiler" his smooth voice reminded me.

"come on in" I answered in my best seductive voice. I walked in front of him, and could almost feel his eyes on me.

When we got to the kitchen, he bent down in front of me to check out what needed to be done.

"ah, I see the problem. I can fix it in no time." he winked at me as he sat up. I wondered if he even noticed he was sitting in a large puddle of water.

I walked over close to him and said, almost at a whisper, "can you show me?"

as his face turned to mine, I purposefully stayed close enough that our lips were inches apart. He had very kissable looking lips, and I licked mine in obvious anticipation. I saw him hesitate, for only a second before he whispered back.

"what would you like to see?" his eyes were becoming hooded with obvious lust, and it was really turning me on. Both of us were starting to breath a little harder.

I made to point across him, then my foot 'accidentally' slipped in the puddle, causing me to land on top of him.

"oops" I said mischievously. And then we were kissing. I had been right, his lips were very kissable, and he was very talented with his tongue.

He fell backward, landing on his elbow, but pulling me down with him, as we kissed and groped each other audaciously. I rolled us over, landing me in the puddle. I didn't care though, I was already wet by now. I started tugging at his zip and pulling it down, revealing his t shirt underneath. He was wearing far too many clothes.

He seemed to agree as he left my lips so he could strip off the suit, quickly followed by his shirt. His chest was gorgeous. It was fine-toned and slim. While he started fiddling with the zipper to his trousers I couldn't help but attack his chest with both hand and my lips. Then he pushed me back slightly and met my lips again. Our tongues battled together ferociously as his hands made their way up my thigh. He found my underwear and pulled it down, while I lifted myself up to help.

My dress was completely soaked now and was holding us back. As I stood up to take it off, he stood with me, our lips never departing and his hands never slowing over my body. Before I could even undo the buttons he was lifting me up on to the worktop, and pulling down his boxers. Then he was entering me. I let out a soft moan and could feel how it turned him on even more.

As he thrust against me, he trailed kisses down my throat, and collar bone. He kept kissing up and down while he fondled my breast with his spare hand. I couldn't help but moan along with each movement, I could feel the familiar heat rising inside me. I panted into his ear, telling him I was close.

He was grunting to now and I pulled his face up to mine again so we could kiss as we both climaxed together. I sighed into his mouth, as he pushed into me one last time, his eyes squeezed shut.

We panted against each other for a moment, before we both realised where we were.

"Umm..I suppose I'd better fix you're boiler now" he smirked, as he pulled on his clothes again. "I'm Jasper by the way. Jasper Hale."

"Alice Brandon" I answered with a cheeky smile. "nice to meet you Jasper Hale."

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**I hope you all enjoyed my take on a classic! LOL Please review to let me know what you thought!**

**Check out Bee87's story on: www. fanfiction. net/s/5314695 (take out the spaces!)**

**Also, if you have any ideas for another one-shot mini comp myself and Bee87 can take on between us, then drop us a line! we're open for any ideas :)**


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